Last week was the best week I spent in Ireland so far. I spent a lot of it hanging out with the people I met in Vienna, but I also met some new friends. I’ve realized I enjoy hanging out with people from other cultures more than I enjoy hanging out with most of the Americans here, save only a few. Most of the Americans who are studying abroad here this semester hang out in one big group and rarely interact with the Irish or people from other cultures unless it’s their roommates. That seems so silly to me, why would you come to a foreign country just to hang out with more Americans? The Irish think it’s pretty silly too, they laugh when they see groups of “Yanks” all hanging out together in pubs. One of the people I was introduced to this week was a Frenchman whose name I can’t recall because the friend who introduced him to me just kept calling him “the weird French guy,” a title he seemed to enjoy more than take offense to. He would randomly burst into song when we were walking through Dublin, including La Marseilles (thank goodness Ireland played Scotland that afternoon and not France, or else he would have been in for it!) and any other French song he could think of. He enjoyed making fun of my American accent, saying when I said “France” it sounded like a duck quacking or someone hitting a buzzer, haha. At the end of the night when we were saying goodbye I gave him a hug before I thought about it. He had such a funny look on his face! He said with a grimace that hugging “is such a lovely way of saying goodbye.” It wasn’t until after I hugged him that I remembered the French don’t hug, they kiss on the cheek; I guess I’ll have to remember that next time, although I think I feel the same way about kissing on the cheek as he does about hugging!
Up until recently, interaction between Tiffany and I and our two Spanish roommates has been a bit chilly. They seemed very friendly when we first met them, but we never really talked to them much because we never saw them. Then last Thursday, Marina (one of my roommates) had a bunch of friends fly in from Spain for the weekend. They pounded on my door late Thursday night and asked if I wanted to go out to the bars with them. They were very insistent (started chanting Mel-ee-sa! Mel-ee-sa!) until I finally gave in. Marina insisted that I should go with them, and she asked why I’d never gone out with them before, nor joined in any of the parties they had in the living room. I told her I didn’t think I was invited, since it was always Marina and Rose (my other roommate) and their friends. Marina told me there was an open invitation to me anytime—she seemed to think this was obvious, so apparently this was a cultural difference I was not aware of. She also told me that since I never went out with them that she thought I didn’t like them! I’m not sure how she made that connection, but I told her that definitely wasn’t the case, so she told me I would have to go out with them more often (“Every time!” some of the Spanish boys cried, but I told them most of the time would have to suffice, haha). It was grand, going out with the Spanish and dancing until early in the morning. I’m glad that things are no longer tense between my roommates and I and that all our miscommunications are worked out.
Just in time for St. Patty’s Day, here are a few Irish myths I’ll debunk for you: Firstly, the Irish don’t pinch people if they’re not wearing green on St. Patty’s Day—that must have been something Americans came up with. Also, the Irish don’t say “Top of the mornin’ to ya!” ever. Most Dubliners don’t drink Guinness—it’s an old man drink, for the most part, and if they do drink it they don’t call it “the black stuff,” at least in Dublin. If you guys have any other questions for me about life in Dublin, just ask!
Peace ‘n love,
Melissa
[Pictures are from Howth, a small village and harbor a short train ride from Dublin]
*****EDIT******
There was a great article in the NYTimes a few days ago about the relationship between Ireland and the US; here's the link if you didn't get to see it:
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/03/16/world/europe/16irish.html?_r=1&th&emc=th
Lovely post dear. I've experienced the same phenomenon in Senegal: Americans clustering together. It makes it rather difficult to immerse oneself in the culture if you're not spending time with the people of the culture. :)
ReplyDeleteI love the culture differences you've mentioned in your last two posts (the German characteristic of promptness, the weird French guy's reaction to your hug, and the
Spanish girls' assumptions).
Keep loving your experience!!!
- Miranda
Melissa,
ReplyDeleteFirst of all I agree that as an American studying abroad, not interacting with the culture is just plain wasteful. Reading that part actually made me feel ashamed of how we act abroad, and it is something that we have studied in Lewis that said Americans are lazy when it comes to culture assimilation. We would rather have people adapt to us rather than us adapt to their culture. It shows that we are insensitive, and it is something that we will have to change in order to fit into the new world politics.
Then I thought it was interesting to see how the French man interacted with you because I was not surprised to hear that he was quite loud. Now Americans are loud and they can be obnoxious, but how do we compare to the French man's actions. I doubt he was obnoxious because you seemed to get along with him, but was he like us in terms of voice level.
Well thanks for the update on Ireland, and thank you very much for stopping the "top of the mornin" charade. I have had experiences with Irishman before and I agree, they do not say that in casual conversation.
Tom
Melissa,
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you and your Spanish roommates have worked everything out, it seems to be a similar problem here with people who have international roommates. I also really liked your story about the French guy. It fits really well with our discussions of cultural leadership. If you had thought about it before, do you think you would have said goodbye by kissing the cheek rather than hugging? Or should he have understood where you were coming from and adjusted to the hug? Maybe in the future you can do both!
Amelia
Tom,
ReplyDeleteI completely agree that Americans will need to assimilate to other cultures better in order to fit into this new globalized society.
As for the Frenchman, he was definitely not obnoxious, he was very sweet and funny. He wasn't really being overly loud, not even when he was singing in the street, but it's kind of hard to say because most of the time I was talking to him we were in a pub and it was pretty loud.
Amelia,
I think if I had thought about it when I was saying goodbye to the Frenchman I would have let him initiate the farewell. In that case he would have kissed me on the cheeks, and...I don't know what I would have done, probably laughed and told him in America we give hugs, and see how he reacted to that. I know my Spanish roommates usually kiss on the cheeks to greet people and say goodbye to them, but they also hug. Maybe I will have to ask them if that's because they've been around so many Americans/Irish or if hugging is a part of their culture, unlike the French.
Thanks for reading!
Melissa,
ReplyDeleteLatin culture is all about establishing trust, and especially more through actions than words. It is good to hear that the tension has lessened between you girls and that you are all able to connect now.
Do you think you could debunk another Irish myth for me? I have always been taught never to wear red on St. Patrick's Day because it represents the Irish bloodshed from the attacks of the British. Did you see anyone wearing red in Ireland on St. Patrick's Day?
Keep up the adventuresome spirit!
Lauren :)